PoeticaL CookS
Cooking Tips
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Tip 1:

If you burn it, bury it.

No one will ever know. It's much better to hide these culinary errors than it is to let someone see it. They'll taste everything you ever make in the future with trepidation and the obligatory "remember that horrible....

Tip 2:

If it doesn't taste good claim it was take out.

It's always good to keep some take out menus stuck to your refrigerator to back up this lie. Dial a Meal will take the blame anyday. Who's going to call and check?

The only problem with this tip is you better also have some styrofoam boxes smashed in the garbage. You never know when someone's going to get suspicious.

Tip 3:

Practice his favorites on people you don't value.

It's much better to dissapoint your everyday pals than it is to claim you can cook only to destroy your reputation when the souffle falls or the grilled cheese gets a little too grilled...ie: Burnt. (refer to Tip 1 quick!)

Some guys live on grilled cheese. Far be it for me to mess up a good thing. So....

Tip 4:

Ask his Mom how she does it!

You don't have to agree. Hell you don't even have to eat it. But if you cut that peanut butter sandwich the way that Mom did. Or pick the seeds out of his watermelon the way Mom did it...you might just win points. He'll forget about the missing side dish. (refer to Tip 1)

Tip 5:

Do NOT cook every single day of the week!

Those butterscotch cookies will no longer have the desired effect if they are plentiful all the time. Those cookies are powerful....use your power wisely!

Tip 6:

Cook in the Nude

Trust me he won't care what your cooking as long as your hot. (A french maids uniform can be substituted for those shy cooks out there!)

Tips Index

Tip 1: Burn it, bury it.
Tip 2: Claim it was take out.
Tip 3: Practice on...
Tip 4: Ask his Mom...
Tip 5: Do Not cook every day!
Tip 6: Cook in the Nude!
Tip 7: On it's way....

at the end of the day....just enjoy the art of creation